Wednesday, February 11, 2009

"Big" Mountains

I'm so nervous right now...
In less than 12 hours I'll be dressed up in my student nursing outfit, headed out to my first clinical... How can it be that after over a month of preparation, I feel so unready!
And it's not just a little part of the clinical that I'm anxious about-- it's the whole thing! Is everyone as apprehensive as I am on their first clinical? I feel presumptuous thinking that everything will go well tomorrow, when I have no idea how to do anything... But maybe it's just my lack of faith in believing that even though I can't mentally go through every single thing that I'm supposed to, that it wont come as second nature to me at the right time...

If I ever finish this semester without accidentally hurting someone, I will be sooo relieved. What's most likely going to happen is tomorrow at this time I will be trying to understand why on earth I was so afraid about the whole thing. But I don't want to forget how incapable I feel tonight, so when I face other "mountains" that seem inserpassable, I'll have the courage and faith to believe that God is in charge, and wont ever give me more than I can bear.

It's so important for us not to forget how God has led us in the past. If we simply look back at how many times he's saved our lives both physically and spiritually, we'll get the extra boost of faith, trust, and courage. Nursing clinicals? No problem. I know God will enlighten me every step of the way. Whatever happens with me tomorrow, He'll be right there with me.
Isaiah 40:31


  1. Amen Sista! :)
    That is something I always have to remind myself when I am facing unknown territory...God has always helped me before and He will help me now. He truly has never failed us!
    They say our worst fears never happen, but I think that the worst can happen but if it does God will make it not as bad as you thought it would be and He will help you through it!
    I'll be praying it all goes ok for you.

  2. Thanks for your prayers... As it turns out, the hospital I randomly signed up at is known for having the most acutely ill patients, so our first day was different than all the other students. We spent the whole 4 hours getting oriented on all the things we CAN'T and HAVE to do. Like we have to wear mask and gowns and gloves in almost every room, cuz of all the infectious diseases there, etc. Tomorrow is when I get to do all sorts of stuff with my first patient. I just found out who my patient is going to be, and boy is my human nature screaming for a way out... So tomorrow I start my clinicals at 6:30 and finish at 12noon. So Azure, your prayers for me tomorrow are highly desired!!!!
    Some days, I wonder what made me be crazy enough to choose nursing... But hey.